Saltwater Counseling & Wellness
Saltwater Counseling & Wellness

Why Low Self-Esteem is Holding You Back and How to Build Confidence

Denielle Rigoglioso • January 12, 2025

Why Low Self-Esteem is Sabotaging You, and How to Break Free

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Low self-esteem can feel like an invisible weight, holding you back from the life you want to live. At Saltwater Counseling, we understand how deeply self-esteem affects your choices, relationships, and dreams. You might feel like you’re not enough or that success and happiness are out of reach. But we’re here to remind you that change is possible. In this article, we’ll explore how self-esteem works, how it develops, why it’s vital, and, most importantly, how you can start improving it today.


What Self-Esteem Is


Self-Esteem Defined

Self-esteem is the way you perceive your own worth and value. It’s not just about what you think of yourself—it’s how you feel about those thoughts. Whether it’s triumph or doubt, confidence or hesitation, self-esteem shapes how you experience life. When your self-esteem is balanced, you’re better equipped to handle challenges and setbacks without feeling defeated.


Self-Esteem Is Best Described As

Think of self-esteem as the lens through which you see yourself. A positive self-image helps you believe in your abilities and set healthy boundaries. On the other hand, a negative self-image can make you second-guess your decisions, avoid risks, or feel unworthy of love and success. It influences how you treat yourself and how you let others treat you.


Self-Esteem Example

Imagine Shannon, a college student balancing work and friendships. Despite occasional setbacks, she approaches challenges with determination and seeks support when needed. Her ability to learn from mistakes and move forward reflects healthy self-esteem. Shannon’s journey reminds us that self-esteem isn’t about perfection—it’s about resilience and self-respect.

How Does Self-Esteem Develop?


Self-Esteem Can Be Developed Through

Your self-esteem starts forming early in life through a mix of internal and external influences. Supportive family relationships, encouraging mentors, and positive social interactions all play a role. At Saltwater Counseling, we often emphasize that self-esteem isn’t fixed—it’s a skill you can build with time and care. Reflecting on accomplishments, learning from struggles, and surrounding yourself with supportive people are all steps toward growth.


When Self-Esteem is Low

Low self-esteem can create a cycle of self-doubt and avoidance. You might feel paralyzed by fear of failure or believe that you don’t deserve success. This can make everyday tasks feel overwhelming and lead to isolation or frustration. Breaking this cycle starts with recognizing these patterns and seeking compassionate guidance.


When Self-Esteem is High

When self-esteem is high, you can navigate life’s ups and downs with confidence. It doesn’t mean you never feel insecure, but it allows you to face challenges with resilience. High self-esteem empowers you to take risks, build fulfilling relationships, and advocate for your needs. It’s the foundation for a life rooted in self-acceptance and purpose.


Why Self-Esteem Is Important


Does Self-Esteem Really Matter?

Yes, self-esteem matters. It affects how you show up in every area of your life—from your relationships to your career. Low self-esteem often leads to missed opportunities or settling for less than you deserve. By building a healthier self-view, you open doors to personal growth, connection, and joy.


Is It Okay to Have No Self-Esteem?

Living with no self-esteem can feel overwhelming and isolating. It’s not a matter of willpower; low self-esteem often stems from deeper struggles like trauma, negative self-talk, or lack of support. If this resonates with you, know that healing is possible. Therapy provides a safe space to rebuild your sense of worth and believe in yourself again.


How Does Self-Esteem Affect Your Life?

Self-esteem is the cornerstone of your mental and emotional well-being. It influences how you handle rejection, celebrate success, and connect with others. A strong sense of self-worth empowers you to set goals, pursue passions, and build healthy boundaries. Without it, even small challenges can feel insurmountable.


Why Do Humans Need Self-Esteem?

Humans thrive when they feel valued and capable. Self-esteem gives you the confidence to pursue your dreams and the strength to overcome setbacks. It helps you feel secure in who you are, fostering healthy relationships and personal growth. At Saltwater Counseling, we believe everyone deserves to experience the freedom that comes with healthy self-esteem.


Can Self-Esteem Be Improved?


Self-Esteem vs. Self-Concept

While self-esteem refers to how you evaluate your worth, self-concept is broader and focuses on how you see yourself as a whole. Self-concept encompasses all aspects of your identity, such as your personality, values, and roles in life. At Saltwater Counseling, we guide clients in aligning their self-concept with a positive sense of self-worth, which helps to strengthen their overall self-esteem.


Self-Esteem and Self-Confidence

Self-esteem and self-confidence are closely connected but not identical. Self-confidence relates to your belief in your abilities in specific areas, such as public speaking or problem-solving. Self-esteem, on the other hand, is a deeper sense of intrinsic value that doesn’t depend on accomplishments. Building both can empower you to face challenges and pursue your goals without fear of failure.


Self-Esteem Versus Self-Worth

Self-worth is the belief that you are inherently valuable, regardless of your achievements or how others view you. Self-esteem often fluctuates based on life circumstances, but self-worth is a steadier, more fundamental concept. At Saltwater Counseling, we help clients explore this distinction to nurture an unshakable sense of self-worth.


Self-Esteem and Social Media

Social media can significantly impact self-esteem, often in ways we don’t realize. Constant comparisons to others’ curated lives can lead to feelings of inadequacy. It’s easy to forget that what we see online is not the full picture. By learning to engage with social media mindfully, you can reduce its negative effects on self-esteem and focus on building a healthy relationship with yourself.


Self-Esteem Exercises

There are many practical ways to improve self-esteem, and these small steps can make a big difference over time. Here are some techniques we often recommend:

  • Practice mindfulness to stay present and reduce negative self-talk.
  • Challenge unhelpful thoughts and replace them with constructive ones.
  • Celebrate small successes to build confidence in your abilities.
  • Avoid comparing yourself to others and focus on your own journey.
  • Surround yourself with supportive people who uplift and encourage you.
    At Saltwater Counseling, we offer personalized strategies to help you incorporate these practices into your daily life.


Self-Esteem Therapists in Virginia Beach, VA


If you’re struggling with self-esteem, professional therapy can be a powerful step forward. At Saltwater Counseling, we specialize in helping individuals build self-esteem through compassionate, evidence-based approaches.


Our team includes licensed therapists who understand how low self-esteem can impact every aspect of your life. Whether it’s through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), mindfulness techniques, or strength-based counseling, we tailor our services to meet your unique needs.


We believe that self-esteem isn’t just about feeling good; it’s about building a foundation of self-respect and inner strength. If you’re ready to take the first step toward a healthier relationship with yourself, we’re here to help.


Saltwater Counseling offers telehealth services to make therapy accessible and convenient for you. Reach out today to schedule an appointment or learn more about how we can support your journey to self-esteem and self-worth.



Final Thoughts on Breaking Free from Low Self-Esteem


Low self-esteem can feel like a constant obstacle, impacting your relationships, career, and overall happiness. But it’s important to remember that self-esteem is not fixed, it can be nurtured and improved. At Saltwater Counseling, we’ve seen countless individuals overcome self-doubt and develop a stronger sense of self-worth.


Whether it’s through therapy, self-reflection, or incorporating small changes into your daily routine, there’s always hope for growth. Healing takes time, but every step forward brings you closer to the confidence and peace you deserve.


If this journey feels overwhelming, you don’t have to do it alone. Professional support can provide the guidance and encouragement you need to rebuild your self-esteem. We’re here to walk alongside you and help you unlock your potential for a more fulfilling and confident life.


FAQs


1. What are the signs of low self-esteem?

Common signs include constant self-criticism, fear of failure, difficulty asserting yourself, and avoiding challenges. People with low self-esteem may also struggle with feelings of inadequacy or shame.


2. Can therapy really help improve self-esteem?

Absolutely. Therapy provides a safe space to explore the root causes of low self-esteem and develop healthier thought patterns. Techniques like CBT and strength-based counseling are particularly effective.


3. How long does it take to build self-esteem?

The timeline varies from person to person. Building self-esteem is a gradual process that depends on factors like your past experiences and the support you receive. Progress often comes in small, meaningful steps.


4. Can social media affect self-esteem?

Yes, social media can contribute to low self-esteem by encouraging constant comparison and the pressure to meet unrealistic standards. Being mindful of your social media usage can help mitigate these effects.


5. How do I get started with therapy for self-esteem issues?

Reaching out to a therapist is the first step. At Saltwater Counseling, we make the process simple and welcoming. Contact us today to schedule a free consultation and begin your journey toward a healthier sense of self-worth.

Saltwater Counseling in Virginia Beach, VA

At Saltwater Counseling, we are dedicated to helping you navigate life’s challenges and discover your balance. Our team specializes in areas like anxiety, depression, trauma, self-growth, relationships, parenting, and more. We tailor our approach to meet your unique needs, offering expert guidance to help you heal, grow, and thrive.

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